Time

A few years back I used to play world of Warcraft. Then I stopped playing. For about a week I had no idea what to do. I couldn't remember what I did with my time when I wasn't playing Warcraft.

Now, I am sitting here at my desk. I have no homework. Jo is hanging out with his grandma (she invited him over).

I have no idea what to do.

I'm not bored, and there is a plethora of things I could do. There always is. Anyone who says "there's nothing to do" has never been to a library and doesn't know that Project Gutenberg is a thing. There's plenty I can do. I own a house for heaven's sake. It's a 30 year old house, there is a ton to do. Most I can't afford, but there's stuff to do. But there is nothing I have to do. I can sit here and stare at the wall if I so please.

More to the point, I don't know what I want to do. I haven't had that luxury in so long I'm confused by the question. I can't even seem to generate options. I'm just sitting here like. "People sometimes choose what they do with their time?" These are of course strange people, wise enough to avoid grad school. I envy these people.

So, here's a picture of Jo. Mo sent me this picture before the MFT exam. Evidently, Jo was wishing me good luck.

Triumvirate of Emotional Extortion

These the the three greatest (worst) examples of emotional extortion in existence. Regardless of your views about any of them, you will happily hand over money to make the sadness stop. 

But it won't. 

They will haunt you for all time. If you can successfully watch all of them and feel no pang of anguish, no grief at the stark pain of reality, then I challenge that you are broken, wrong, and likely soulless. Potentially, you're just from Nebraska. To numb the the grey waste and unending bleakness to feel anything. 

Behold, The Triumvirate of Emotional Extortion!

First, I give you Linkin Park...somehow using their own brand of music to suck hope out of existence. (totally one of my favorite song now). 

Yup, listening to that on repeat...for a solid hour. 

Next is Sarah McLachlan, whose music can only be made sadder by adding animals. Adding abused, injured, sick animals is beyond the pale.  

This next one is not on You Tube that I can find. It was painful before I had a son. 

Now it is just agonizing.

Click HERE at your own peril. 

If you have viewed these videos and feel nothing, then I cannot pray for your soul. 

You don't have one. 

Resolute

Ugh, January. Fine, let's review. 2013 was a rough year for Jeremy. Although buying the house, my grad work, my dad's heart attack, and other miscellaneous events were enough to cause me great deals of stress, the greatest source of stress was my job. I don't like to talk about my work life on any kind of public forum unless it is a good thing. As such, I don't talk about my work life much on public forums. Suffice to say, I'm far from satisfied with how my work is going. 

Otherwise, most of the year's disasters had some kind of silver lining. 

Finding and buying the house was stressful, but I am pleased with the choice and I feel the price was fair. We got it for several thousand below appraisal value and our rates are decent. The house itself is generally well built, if dated. Most of what needs attention is cosmetic. I just hope the popcorn ceiling is not asbestos. 

I am almost done with grad school and met some wonderful people who I hope will be friends for years to come. The education itself has been life changing. 

Although the heart attack was absolutely horrid, my family is eating much better than we ever have. December was an expected mess of snacks and fats, but less salt than ever before. We've mentioned how we have a hard time eating out now, fast food is just soooooo salty. 

So let's take a look at the ol' resolutions of 2013. 

1. Get through the MBA program. 

Well, I switched to the 8-week courses option and those went surprisingly well. I was terrified they would absolutely cripple my ability to pass the classes. Not so, I had to sacrifice some other activities, but I think it is the best option. Only 1 more class. So, although I did not technically meet this resolution, I certainly lived up to the intention. 

2. Son-day posts every other week. 

This was one of the things I had to sacrifice. I just did not have the energy to keep up with the daditude blog. So, although many photos were taken, few were posted. Here's a picture of Jo on the thing my parents got him. 

He likes to 'go hide' in the bottom part. 

3. Attend either martial arts or fitness class once a week. 

For the most part, I pulled this off. During an exam week or other high stress week, I missed class. I also messed up my back for a couple weeks and missed then too. It sucked but it was another one of those sacrifices I had to make. I owe my instructors a huge thanks for their patience and understanding. In May, all this school non-sense is over and I will have free time to work out. horray!

4. Reduce my books by half. 

During the move, a bunch of books went to Half-price books. I added a few to my digital library, which I have no need to reduce. I've kept some of the best ones and although I would like to reduce my possessions further, I may be done with my books for now. It may not be half, but it feels like half. 

5. Save 30k toward the house down payment. 

We didn't quite reach 30k, I think we hit 27 or so. Turns out, we didn't need 30k. Let me tell you though, writing that check was crazy. Had we not moved on the house in 2013, we would have easily met this goal. Ultimately, a success to be sure. 

A series of things.

We had our first christmas in the house. Karen and Tamara came down and stayed a few days. T is still here for a few more events. Then life will start moving back to normal. 

Dad continues to improve. Seems his meds were a bit off but seem to be under control more. He's also getting better about not over-extending himself and keeping the strain on his heart to a minimum. For a guy like him, that's prolly the hardest part of the whole mess. 

I raked the lawn...it was horrid. I am so looking forward to getting those trees out of the backyard. I'm really glad we got rid of the one hanging over the house. I'm not sure it would have stayed up through the ice storm we had last week. It was a half inch of ice on...everything really. 

No photos right now, but the kitchen is coming along. Mo chose a light switch plate that required me to change the wiring on *all* the switches in the kitchen. Not my favorite part of the ordeal, but it's done and they look good. The stone backsplash is coming along too. We're nearly done!

In Jo news, he is now a crazy 2-year-old. He started getting speech therapy a few months back. Not sure if I mentioned that. Curiously, his speech path is one my old professor's wife. That's neat and his speech is getting better. More words and phrases all the time. Still hard to understand and likes to grunt or make noises rather than talk, but he's getting there. 

We also changed daycare. We LOVED the daycare at Integris, but we needed to disconnect Mo's job from our childcare. So we put him back into the daycare he was in when he was a tiny baby. He's doing well there and seems to fit in well. 

Finally, I am about to start the last class of my MBA. I'm nervous as hell, but ready to get this wagon rolling and graduate. I'll be with 2 of my long-term project group mates, I couldn't hope for better. I'm not convinced there is better. Not sure what is going to happen once I have the degree. This semester will be full of changes I think. 

My happy student

I have this one student who I like very much, but sometimes I really don't like her. I know that doesn't make sense right now, give me a few more sentences.

See, she's a really upbeat and positive person. You know the kind. The kind that somehow, magically, naively, almost childishly sees the good in just about everyone and everything. It's like somehow the sheer irritating mess of the universe just passes over her without touching her in the slightest.

Now, I know her well enough that I know she gets down. She even complains sometimes. She gets sad. She get angry. She carries mountains of stress and anxiety more often than not. So, you might think her normal personality is some kind of 'fake out' or a facade. Basically, a lie she tells the world to keep from going insane.

Maybe it is, but I don't think so. I think somewhere along the line she decided to be happy and then (and here is the important part) learned how to be happy. (I used italics, so you know it's important).

Lots of inspirational messages will want you to 'decide to be happy' and that's all well and good. Not horridly helpful though. I'd love to decide to be good at drywall installation. Until I actually learn how to do it, that little decision is pointless.

So, I like her because her personality is upbeat and pleasant.
I really don't like her sometimes because she's so good at something I don't know how to do.

How did she learn to be happy? I have no idea, but I'm gonna figure that out. Then I'm gonna learn to do it.

Recovery and Countertops

Last time, I mentioned my dad was in the hospital. At the time we really did not have a very clear idea of everything that was going on. Basically, two things tried to kill him at the same time. Oddly enough, because it was two things, neither succeeded.

Basically, he had a bacterial blood infection. We're not 100% sure how, but he did. It got serious and an ambulance was called. We think he may have had a heart attack on the way to the hospital. The heart attack he had has a nick-name. It's called the Widowmaker. It earns that name. Here's the irony: If he had not had the blood infection, it's likely the heart attack was going to happen with no warning and just kill him outright. BUT, because the blood infection tried to kill him first, the heart attack was treatable. BUT, the heart attack had to be treated first before they even found the blood infection. So, because two different, intensely dangerous, conditions both tried to get through the 'kill you' door at the same time, they got stuck and failed comically.

Surviving,
Like a Boss. 

It was a really intense few days. He stayed 10 days in the hospital and then a couple weeks at home recovering with a PICC line and a drain line. The drain line hurt and we were all happy to see it go. Since it came out, his recovery has been intense. He still gets tired pretty easy and has to watch his exertion, but he's back to work and getting caught up.

I could EASILY fill a blog about how great Dove Academy (where he works) has been. They had flowers in his room before he even got there. The principal came and visited. They've been nothing but awesome through the whole thing. I'll leave it at that.

So, today, I was able to get him to help me redo the sink. Now we also redid the countertops. Well, Mo did. I just primed them. So, here are more before and afters.

Before

After, lights on

After, lights off

Here's a close up of the counter tops. This Giani Granite stuff looks surprisingly good. Mo did a great job.

See that new switch? I did that. It was hard, but it works. 

You might notice, the faucet looks different and the sink is now stainless steel. That is what Dad I did together today. It took most of the day and we are both tired now.

But, it looks really, really good. 

Vacation renovation

The week before last I took a vacation from work. This is the first time I've taken a vacation in three years. That was a mistake.

I'm just going to put this right here. 

It was nice being away from the clinic for a bit. Spent time with the family, worked on a couple house projects.

Jo is doing well. He's seeing a speech path, he's babbling a lot and it's getting to be consistent, but it horridly unclear. Not really words. It's getting better slowly. He started daycare and that is going well too. While I was off work we took him to the OK Aquarium

armed with blanket and glowing eyes, he fears no shark. 

It was fun, but the trip was long and hard on him.

My glasses broke just before the vacation. I had to get a cheap pair to cover while my real glasses were put together. They are the cheapest pair that eye mart would sell me.

hello ladies. 

Mo convinced me to get prescription sunglasses. They came in just before I drove down to TX for Jack's "I'm not in the Marines anymore party". Fun times. However, he was disappointed that my mom did not come visit too.

Jack sad. 

But it was good to see the Hendrix and I could not be more proud of him and excited about his new job.

The rest of the vacation was spent dealing with finishing stage 1 of the kitchen make over. The painting and such was easy, just time consuming and an exercise in patience. The new hinges were a nightmare but eventually they got sorted out.
here's some before and after shots.

before

after

before

after

before

after

So that's stage 1.

About 20 minutes after the photos were taken, I ripped that horrid laminate backsplash off. The next stage will be to add some under cabinet lighting. Then paint the counter top, then do a new backsplash.

But right now, we're dealing with my dad who is in the hospital.